It takes time to get what you want.
Let me provide a trivial example.
When I moved to NYC in the beginning of the summer, I wanted to pick up tennis.
But I was new to tennis and had nobody to play with…
I searched “tennis club new york city” on Google and it all seemed so complicated.
“It costs $100+ to play for just one hour?”
Then I heard about the public courts, and it seemed even more complicated.
“How do I wait for a court? I have to wait hours to play? Who will play with me?”
I gave up, for two weeks.
“I guess it isn’t all that realistic to pick up tennis in a city like New York...”
Then I ran into a friend who told me he’d been playing. I asked if he would play with me and he said yes.
We met up at the court, and while waiting for a court, I met a girl who was also waiting. I set up time to play with her the following week.
After playing with her a couple times, I met another guy. We started playing weekly.
A couple weeks later, after finishing up a game with him, I saw an old friend’s twin brother waiting for a court. I introduced myself and we started playing weekly.
While all of these random connections were happening, my IRL friends also started to get involved. My roommate got a racket. And then my best friend got a racket. And then his girlfriend got a racket.
I had even more people to play and learn with.
Then, their friends, and friends of friends wanted to get involved, too. So many people that we started to have to play doubles. I continued to meet more friends of friends who wanted to play.
By the end of the summer, I had dozens of tennis partners. Dozens of people I could text anytime and ask to play, or they would text me and ask to play.
Too many people, actually! I started playing twice a day, 14 times a week! But I loved it.
This is all a silly example, but my takeaway here is it takes time.
In the beginning of the summer, I felt hopeless and didn’t know where to start. But through small, consistent effort, I built this tiny little tennis community and made dozens of friends and ended up with endless opportunities to play tennis.
And that brings me to today...
I’m in Tampa, a new city, and I still want to play tennis regularly. I’m frustrated that I have no one to play with, and finding even one person to play with feels daunting…
But I must remember that it takes time!
I should just focus on finding just one partner, rather than expecting to have what I had in New York.
Start small. One partner at a time. From there, I will build.
It all starts with something. Want to write? Start with one word, one sentence. Start a business? Start with one simple task.
You don't set out to build a wall. You don't say 'I'm going to build the biggest, baddest, greatest wall that's ever been built. ' You don't start there. You say 'I'm gonna lay this brick as perfectly as a brick can be laid,' and you do that every single day, and soon you have a wall.” - Will Smith