March 12th, 2020
I just had this thing happen to me where I "shrink".

I had a video call with a Pigeon customer - we agreed to jump on a call to catch up since we both had a random mutual connection.

I didn't know much about this guy or his business that he ran, but when I got on the call we started to talk about our businesses and I "shrunk". I became "smaller", I became more nervous and I lost my confidence.

We run similar businesses but in a way different market. He's more of a VC-thinker and thinks more abstractly - more like a CEO-type. When he talked about his business, he made it seem like he had it all figured out - in terms of his business model, traction, etc.

And for some reason, this kind of thing triggers something inside of me where I feel my own business or success is much smaller, even if it's not the case.

This is the same exact thing that happened to me when I went through the YC interview process last year - especially during the mock interviews with successful YC founders. I couldn't "speak the language" of these people and it made me feel very inadequate. There's a certain language they have - it's this abstract/nebulous way of talking about startups and ideas that maybe don't even exist yet. 

"Integrations, synergies, partnerships, market, distribution, blahhhh"

I understand what these words mean but if we start talking about them in the context of a business, my mind starts to wander because it doesn't feel concrete enough for me.

Maybe it's just how my brain is wired - more of a practical/engineer/maker type rather than abstract/thinker/entrepreneur/politician/leader.

When these conversations start to happen, I shrink. Because it makes me feel less smart and less capable.

And in that scenario, that lack of confidence is reflected in how I talk about my own business(es) - I don't speak very highly of them - I don't talk enough about the "big idea". If I ever speak highly, it's only about the metrics - traffic, revenue, etc - but I don't bring that up in conversation. It's not that I don't want to - I don't know - I just don't have it in me.

For me, the success of my business is in the past, almost like I forgot about it. I'm focused on the new problems to solve and the new challenges, only. I'm always thinking about what's wrong with my business. 

And whenever I talk about myself, I often bring up weaknesses. This blog is a good example. I always want to expose what's wrong with me - what can be improved - and how I'm working on that.

And it's definitely reflected because by the end of the meeting he asked me if I wanted to join his team as an engineer. In my own head, it's so obvious that I would never do that - I'm so happy with what I'm working on now that I wouldn't be an engineer or an employee anywhere! But I obviously didn't portray that on the call.

I probably looked like a failing, lost entrepreneur.

I need to work on this - this is a good thing this happened - these kinds of scenarios always put me out of my comfort zone.

March 11th, 2020
One thing I'm not proud of is how much I care about followers and "follower etiquette" on social media.

I have a rough mental list of a few people that won't follow me on Twitter even though they know who I am. For what reason? I have no idea. But that fact that I care about it and think about it is fucking pathetic.

Often, I'll be having a conversation over Twitter and I'll hover over someone's username to see if it says "FOLLOWS YOU". I'm embarrassed to admit how much I check that.

I'm very careful with who I follow on Twitter, because why? I don't know. It definitely doesn't matter, at all...

I look at my follower and following count every day when I log onto Twitter. I have a mental note of where it is and how much it's gone up.

It feels nice to admit this. I'd like to not give a fuck about this because it would clear up so much mental energy.

But I think we all care about this stuff to some degree. It's so petty though.

I'm not proud of any of this, but I also don't think it's just me being a sociopath. These social media companies build these features to make you feel like that.

Younger generations have much less shame about how much they care about followers. I'm not sure why. Kids think a lot about "follower etiquette". And you see it in the news, too, for example.

March 10th, 2020
Yesterday, I was getting off the plane and walking across the crosswalk exiting the airport.

I was walking really slow and hobbling because I was so sore from the marathon. My legs were like sticks because I couldn't really bend them at the knee without being in a lot of pain, sometimes a big step felt like I would crumble and would have to brace myself.

There was a car waiting at the crosswalk for me. He had a lot of room - and definitely could have just driven through. But they instead gave me the right of way to let me cross - in that crosswalk I had the right of way.

But at the time I didn't notice, I was just walking really slowly because I was in so much pain. I was also messing around on my phone trying to call my mom who was there to pick me up from the airport.

When I finished crossing the crosswalk, the car honked really loud at me and I turned around. The guy in the passenger seat of that car was flipping me off and honking the horn. Then they drove off.

When I saw that, my gut reaction was to flip him off and yell "FUCK YOU" really loud. And that's exactly what I did. I yelled "FUCK YOU" and everyone outside the airport was staring at me. 

As he was driving away, he kept flipping me off and then he drove off, like a coward - he waited until I crossed to make his move so he could drive off quickly.

I was in disbelief. "I'm walking in intense pain and this dude thinks I was trolling him and walking slowly on purpose?" - "I was walking as fast as I could." - "What if I was a disabled person?" - "Is this the type of dude who honks at disabled people?" - "What a cunt".

I couldn't stop thinking about it. I got in the car with my mom and she kept asking me about my trip - but I couldn't focus on anything but this dude that flipped me off.

At the time, I wish I could have "showed him" - like explained my situation so I would be "right" and he would be "wrong".

But the more I thought about it, the more I thought about "perception" - what did he see? He saw a tall-ish white dude who was shuffling through the crosswalk fiddling with his phone, probably texting. He had no idea I ran a marathon. I don't look disabled. I had a backwards hat on. I probably looked like an asshole, to him.

And who knows, maybe this guy had somewhere to be. I assumed this guy getting off his flight too. Maybe he was catching a flight, and was about to miss it because he was late. Maybe someone in his family was sick, or passed away. Who knows!

I wish, in that moment, I didn't turn back around and flip him off as well. I wish I looked at him and just laughed, and then spent the time with my mom having a nice conversation, and didn't think about this guy.

Life's too short to get mad and hold a grudge against a dude who flipped you off from his car.

March 9th, 2020
I came across a Tim Ferriss video recently - I think it was a TED Talk - where he talks about addressing fears rather than setting goals.

What’s your biggest fear? It can be specific to a goal.

If your goal is to start a business, what’s stopping you? What’s your biggest fear? Is it failing and everyone laughing at you? Or failing and not being able to put food on the table?

Rather than worry about those things or worry about the unknown, we can just write that stuff down and come up with a plan.

And lately, the Coronavirus has me worried. It sucks to have finally started a business and it feels like a recession is about to hit… "Why couldn’t I have started 10 years ago when you could make millions off of a simple CRUD app?" 

^ A thought I often have. Coulda shoulda woulda...

 If the economy goes into the shitter, it will affect my businesses, possibly for several years, so let’s talk about the worst-case scenarios and how I can plan for these:

Luckily, I have some liquid investments, but a lot of it is in the stock market. So I need to wait some of those out and I will not be pulling my money out.

But a really bad scenario is this: the economy is so bad that I lose my sponsor for Starter Story and I lose half of my customers for Starter Story and Pigeon?

That is a semi-real scenario. What would I do? I would probably cancel my trip to New York and move back in with my parents. I have enough money to survive for about two years, but I would basically be living under a rock - I’m used to that now though, and it’s not so bad :)

My dad owns his home and I can stay there for free, worst comes to worst.

I could also go back to doing some contract work to bring in income, although that's a big-time last resort option for me.

I watched a really great video last night about how our mindset should be going into and through a possible recession. My big takeaway is to remain calm, don't pull your money out, keep investing per usual and focus on staying employed and keeping cash flowing.

In these times, I need to double down. Work harder. Focus on the fundamentals. While others focus on headlines and worry about the day-to-day, I need to work on staying alive - living cheaply and not needing much.

Because going through this kind of thing, many people give up. Lots of people left the real estate market in the terrible times of 2008 and 2009. But the ones who stayed and grinded it out saw the most fruits of their labor. 2008 was the best time to be in the market, even if you had to work 10x harder than before.

Luckily I have some cash and the resources to stay calm. My business is not VC funded, I'm very profitable, and I can get expenses lower than $500/month by making some small changes. 

And I'm willing to live like shit to avoid taking a shitty job or losing my businesses. But if it came to that - I'd still do it to save my businesses.

March 8th, 2020
Today I ran the LA Marathon.

This was my 3rd marathon. 

  • First marathon I ran in 4:09 in 2017. 
  • 2nd marathon I ran in 4:35 in 2019.
  • 3rd marathon (this one) I ran in 3:43.

My goal was 3:40 and although I didn’t hit that, it was a PR and I’m really happy with the time.

I wrote a post about my 2nd marathon, but I failed miserably with thatone, and this 3rd marathon was a “redemption” for me.

 That 2nd one humbled me. I was overconfident and made shortcuts on my training. I ended up having to walk many miles because I was not properly prepared.

This time was different. I was prepared. I followed all my training plan - almost perfectly. I ran in the snow and 10 degrees Fahrenheit even on days when I didn’t want to.

Most importantly, I never lied to myself. I never lied to myself about what was possible. I don’t set an unrealistic pace goal and I pushed myself during training to hit certain targets.

I lost weight ~18lbs and I cut out drinking. The weight loss made me faster. The no drinking gave me more energy and motivation and I was less tempted to miss days because of a hangover.

For my 2nd marathon, I felt the feeling of “giving up” when I cramped and started walking to ease the pain. I had never felt this before in a race scenario, and when I look back, I regret caving like that. I know in that race, I did not give it my all.

For this race, there was no chance I was going to give up like that, no matter what. There were times where I was in so much pain for this race, but I never once stopped to walk.

I know that I gave this race my all. I gave it everything that I had and now I know what it’s like to feel that way. 

When I crossed the finish line, I cried. Then I laughed in so much relief it was over. Then I cried again. It was one of the best feelings I’ve felt in my life.

After the 2nd marathon I walked away feeling like I gave up, and now I realize that’s worse than any other outcome.

Another thing I noticed - the more I run the more I “do it for myself”.

When I ran my first marathon, it’s a massive accomplishment and it was awesome to get all of the validation from friends and family.

But this time around, I cared less about that. 

I run for myself. 

I noticed this because after the race, my friends kept congratulating me, and I kept thinking “for what?” It didn’t even feel right to be congratulated.

Running is just normal now. Running a marathon is no longer a crazy feat - it’s a normal thing I can do - and the only competition I care about is myself - beating my own time and besting myself.

Of course, the validation is nice and I still want people to know I’m running a marathon. But my favorite part about running the marathon (other than the running itself) is bringing my friends and family to together and hanging around LA.

In general, I don’t call myself a runner and I try not to talk about my running. The only person I talk to about it is my dad because he’s a runner and is genuinely interested in my training and plans.

Anyways, I’m stoked about my time and I will continue on my goal to break 3:30 by the end of the year. I will be training a lot this year and run another marathon this fall.

I will also be running at least 2-3 more half marathons (1 Brooklyn, 1 San Diego already planned).

I also want to run 10k every day for 30 days challenge - I will try to do that in April.

March 7th, 2020
This is a backdated journal entry because I missed a daily journal entry.

If I miss a day, I have to donate some money or support a creator.

This time, I'm supporting yadiiiigg, a YouTube creator who makes hip hop analysis videos.

This kid is an Aussie who's been grinding on YouTube for years now, and I watch his content almost every day. I gotta show him some love since he's put me onto my favorite artists of all time including Lil Peep (way in the early days) and Playboi Carti.

This guy is gonna blow up on YouTube or something else one day. You can find his Instagram here.

Plus, his merch is fire.

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March 6th, 2020
I’m not one of those “I have imposter syndrome woe is me” type of people.

But I definitely experienced a little mini revelation about impostor syndrome.

Before my startup days, I worked as a software engineer. I learned coding from a bootcamp, a non-traditional route.

To be honest, I never thought I was a good engineer. I wasn’t a bad engineer, I was just very mediocre.

I was never able to talk “high level” with other engineers about programming concepts and technologies, so when our engineering teams would have discussions or meetings, I would feel inadequate and just shut down.

I was never good at code reviews. I couldn’t (and still really can’t) read code abstractly - in other words I’m not good at reading code on paper and understanding what it does. It’s better if I write it or walk through it with a debugger.

It always felt like I was moving too slow, and the other engineers were just a whole different level in terms of skill, speed, intelligence, etc - they could just pick things up faster.

After the boot camp, I got a programming job for $105K in SF. I always felt like I was overpaid - for the work I did. “This week I shipped only test code and make $X” or “this week I made a simple change to the settings page”.

I felt like my salary was so high that the company would finally have enough of me and let me go. 

I would get called into a 1:1 with my manager and I was certain I was getting let go, or given a warning about how slow I’m shipping.  Then, they would say “Pat, you’re doing a great job and we’re giving you a raise”. Haha! (Not a crazy raise just normal stuff though)

Once I got a programming job in New York City, I upped my salary again, from what I was making in SF.

That NYC startup had a much stronger engineering team, and I legit felt like I was the worst engineer on the team. However, I had this eerie feeling that I was making more than some of the extremely talented engineers.

This gave me even more impostor syndrome… Anyways, the list goes on but that’s not the point of the story.

Once Starter Story started taking off, I quit. Quitting felt almost like a relief - like I had somehow escaped my firing… I didn’t quit for that reason obviously - I quit to follow where my passion was and start my own business.

It’s been over a year since I quit, and I actually heard from a friend that they had some layoffs in their engineering team a few months ago. I laughed about this and said something like “if I was still working there I would have been one of those layoffs! Thank god Starter Story worked out”.

Anyways, the moral of the story is that this impostor syndrome was mostly in my head!!


Because today, I got an email from the CTO - he asked if I was interested in picking up some contract work for them. 

Me being asked to do contract work? As an engineer? Who the fuck would want to hire me for that!? Haha!

Getting that email was a nice feeling, a little pick me up that I’m not a good-for-nothing software engineer :)

March 5th, 2020
Today was one of those days where I felt so productive that I felt like I was high on drugs.

Sometimes, for me, the feeling of being productive is like a rush. It can be very exciting and enlightening at the same time.

Maybe it felt like this because of how unproductive I've been in the past week...

And as I was leaving the library after what felt like a great day's work, I kept thinking "man if I could be this productive and working on the right things every day I could get so much more done". Because I'm starting to realize it's even less about being productive, but working on the right things.

For me at least, when I first started to feel like I was becoming a more productive human, it was all about the systems - mental, organizational, etc - which is a great place to start - but I think as I develop as an entrepreneur I'm starting to see the most important thing is picking the most important thing and just working on it until it's done. It's that simple. It's so deceptively simple that nobody can even see it - I think 99% of people won't even realize it in their lifetime.

Instead of putting 20 things on your todo list like "clean room" and "go for a run", I need to put the actually most important things FIRST. Get those done now, and then I can "do my laundry". And knock those out by 9:30AM - the items that have been sitting on your todo list forever, but you keep putting them off because they are not fun, or they are scary and give you fear. Or maybe they are not even on my todo list because I'm so scared of them.

But if I can work on these things every day, I know I can get so much further. 

It's less about prioritization, and more about conquering my fears. For me, that could be something like launching a podcast, or asking that girl out that I think is cute, or public speaking. These are just examples, but they are things that I am (or have been) deeply scared of. 

And that's why I keep putting them off. 

If I can identify those, get them done, then I can be superhuman.

Writing this stuff really helps...

I heard this Peter Thiel quote the other day:

How can you achieve your 10 year plan in the next 6 months?

I can't stop thinking about it. What if I could actually get my 10 year goals completed in 6 months? Then I could get 20 10 year goals completed in 10 years! It's really a great question I'd like to ask myself more often.

March 4th, 2020
I need to do less "small things".

Lately, I can *feel* my tolerance for "small things" getting higher. I've been taking too many meetings, too many phone calls, and I'm generally too optimistic lately, I think.

I want to help more people, get more help, make more online connections, and be more involved in the community, but I also feel like these "small things" can be a huge detriment for me personally, just knowing how I operate. Hanging out on Telegram & Twitter & & etc has been awesome lately, but if I look closer, it's really preventing me from getting important stuff done.

I cannot multitask well. One of my best friends (and also extremely productive guy) crushes his todos while watching Netflix - I cannot wrap my head around that.

Yesterday, I woke up at 7am (been waking up early lately) and I got to noon and I had not done any of the big things I wanted to do that day. Just got 7 "small things" done. I realized I was 5 hours into my "workday" and I hadn't done shit!! I was "working" but it was like my brain was scattershot. Not focused. Not deep work.

Just small bullshit items like "reach out to X about failed payment" (an example) and "tweet about Y" and "add weekly calendar event for Z" and other non-essential things.

I've just given myself too many "small commitments" - for example - joining someone's podcast, or even this daily journal. Each little thing like that really does add up big time.

Maybe this is just one of my mood swings. One month I'm completely heads down and don't check Twitter for a month and pessimistic about the maker scene, and then another month "it's the greatest thing in the world" - probably all in my head and also tied to my own success, but yeah...

But it's pretty easy to fix this. What I've been doing lately is cutting my daily todo list from something like 12 items to 3 items. By cutting it down you have to pick the most important ones. The 9 "small things" can wait. OR, you should do them when you think about them. There is a book called Getting Things Done, that says "if you can get something done in 2 minutes, just do it right then" - I need to be better at that.

As always, I need to have a balance.

March 3rd, 2020
When I started writing this daily journal, nobody read it because I never really talked about it. I just wrote every day and I still liked the fact that it was public.

But over the last month, it's started to get some traction. I've been checking up on analytics, and even after the massive traffic of the Hacker News posts and $1K MRR update, the blog is now getting almost 1k page views per day!

The fact that I keep checking these analytics is bad (for me). I fear that optimizing my journal entries for views defeats the purpose of this thing, and it will make my writing worse, or less honest. Lately, I've also felt some more pressure now to deliver a great post every day.

I also think about some of the people that (I know) read this, and think things like "What will X think when they read it"? That is very bad for me.

However, I would be lying if I said that I didn't want people to read this. I would be lying if I said I didn't like that lots of people read it.

People reading it is a motivation for me to do it every day. If it were private, I probably wouldn't keep up with it. Part of the reason for that is probably my ego, and also, I want people to follow the journey, get inspired, and (one day) look back at 4-5 years of journal entries and see what it takes to build a successful business.

So, I won't be taking this private but I will be removing the analytics. I also won't be doing anymore self-promotion other than for milestones and stuff like that. If people read something and love it, they can share it (and I love that).

March 2nd, 2020
this is an excerpt of a monthly email I send to stakeholders

Feb 2020, tldr:

Although traffic was down slightly, Feb was the highest all-time revenue for all projects. Most of Feb was spent shipping features and increasing content output. For March and the foreseeable future, we are focused on adding more value to Starter Story and monetization, including launching a community for Starter Story mid-March. We will also be moving towards freemium for Pigeon (target mid-April).

the good

- A breakout month for pigeon ($1k MRR!)
- Implemented big features to add value to starter story premium (better explore page, csv export, deals on tools)
- Announced starter story community launch date (will be FB group)
- All-time record for starter story interviews (87 shipped interviews!)

the bad

- Traffic down due to slower month & no longer sharing on Reddit or hacker news
- Not making fast enough progress on UGC content - only shipped 1/8 planned (example)


- Total Revenue: $8,898 (88% Starter Story / 12% Pigeon) (+$351)
- Starter Story Traffic: 80K uniques / 106K sessions / 143K pageviews (-20%)
- Interviews published: 87! (highest all time)
- Email List: 12,061 total subscribers (+643 net subscribers)
- Starter Story Premium MRR: $1.2K (highest all time)
- Pigeon MRR: $1.1K (highest all time)

What got done / what went well:

- Onboarding email drip for Starter Story Premium
- Created a form where we ask people why they canceled
- Added discounts on tools (incentive to sign up to premium)
- Announced the launch date for Facebook group community
- Published 87 interviews
- Published 3 more pigeon case studies
- Added more tags on Starter Story backend
- added onboarding email drip for Pigeon (example)
- Pigeon: Added more smart columns
- Built MVP of new lead crawler for Starter Story

Goals for March:

- Launch the starter story community and get it rolling
- Get Pigeon freemium ready for april 10 launch
- Focus on Quora & content marketing for Pigeon
- Finish automated outreach project
- Finish the start page
- Self-service interviews MVP for starter story
- More roundups/UGC for Starter Story (8 posts)
- More content marketing for Pigeon (30 Quora answers, 4 case studies, 2 blog posts)
- Pigeon suggested actions feature
- Pigeon link tracking automation feature

Thanks for reading!

March 1st, 2020
Each month this year, I'm focusing on a new hobby.

So far:

I actually enjoyed the book as far as I got in, but I found it really hard to motivate myself to read it, at all. I wish I was more into reading fiction, but maybe it's just not for me... ? I don't know.

Anyways, onto the next "hobby".

For March, I want to get better at design, UI, and UX and learn more of the fundamentals and be able to implement into my apps.

How I will get better? I will start with some essential books and courses. I just tweeted about it, so let's see what people say.

I've already read Refactoring UI, but maybe I'll read it again.

More to come soon.

(if you're reading this and think I should check out some resource, please send to me!!)

February 29th, 2020
I was chatting with Armin & Melanie from Placid about building a bootstrapped SaaS/app.

We started talking about how it really is a "grind". You really have to do so much work to get 1 customer. You have to do sales, onboarding, support, product development, etc - all by yourself. It's actually kind of crazy how daunting this is in the beginning.

But somewhere in this mayhem, I think there might be a "matrix" or "system" that can lead to a successful product.

This is a really rough concept, but let's call this the Talk/Fix/Improve/Automate process. It goes something like this:

  1. A customer tries your product and does not know how to use it
  2. Customer reaches out with a specific question or feature request
  3. You respond to the customer with the best possible answer
  4. You make a decision if you should change the product, add more documentation, add that new feature, move feature up on roadmap, etc
  5. You automate what you can to prevent that conversation from happening again

And that's pretty much it! If you do this over and over, effectively, I think you can build a great product and a successful business.

However, it's vital that you make the right decisions in this framework. Sometimes, feature requests should be ignored or put into your "someday" box. Sometimes, a small "Help" icon in your product that answers that same question you keep getting can save you hundreds of hours down the line.

Being able to code these small changes quickly is a superpower. Being able to make a change in 10 minutes based on a customer request feels almost magical for the customer.

February 28th, 2020
I took the last 3 days off (during the week) because I was hosting a friend in my hometown.

When I planned for this, I (naively) thought I would be able to squeeze in some work in the early morning or at night.

But I didn't. And the whole time I felt really guilty and had almost a feeling of withdrawal symptoms.

For me, I have a feeling of betrayal to myself when I take time off like this. I feel that for every "missed" day, that's important progress lost. I feel like I will have to make up that time, and now it will just take 3 days longer to reach my goals.

I also feel like I'm betraying my customers, sponsors, etc. What if they knew how much YouTube I watched or knew that I took the day off to go skiing? That time could be spent building a new feature or doing more marketing.

^^ I realize these thoughts are pretty ridiculous, but it's the truth.

I can't imagine that I'm the only one here. I can only think this would be even worse if you had a really tough boss you wanted to impress, or investors/mentors that had money on the line on your new company.

During my "time off", I legitimately had to step away for a couple hours and "catch up" with the business.

I told my friend to take a couple runs and I just sat in the car on my computer and caught up on email, etc. I literally sat in my car outside the ski resort and worked for two hours. How sad is that? After I got that work done, I didn't feel any better either.

And it's funny - doing this, I realized that almost everything could wait until I was back, and the sense of urgency I had was 90% in my own head. But it was less about emails piling up, and it was more about me feeling guilty that I wasn't working.

But it's not all bad, moments like these really help me realize what parts of my business rely on me, and that I need to continue to outsource/hire/automate so that it doesn't need me. I consider these to be "holes" in my business.

I also need to get better at planning time off. If I plan some time off in advance, it will actually inspire me to "get ready" for this time off and fix a bunch of things so that they can run without me. When I took 3 weeks off last year, I hired someone at Starter Story to manage most of the editorial process - they still run it and it has helped us scale so much.

February 27th, 2020
Today, I had a, no joke, near-death experience with moose.

I took the day off to do a 14-mile hike through the snow with my friend.

The hike is through Jenny Lake in Grand Teton National Park. Right now the lake is snowed over and looks like this:

Jenny Lake in Winter

Because the snow is so deep we had to bring snowshoes, which help you stay above the snow but also make you walk really slow.

When we got to the lake we started to walk around the perimeter to get to our destination of the hike.

While we were walking we noticed huge moose tracks in the snow. I didn't think much of this, since I've seen many moose in my life and it's never been an issue. I thought "Oh cool, my friend will get to see a moose".

As we walked along the moose tracks we also noticed smaller moose tracks. I assumed that was from a baby or child moose.

Keep in mind we are in the middle of nowhere and there is nobody else around for miles.

We kept walking further and further.

About 6 miles into the hike I look up and a GIANT moose comes quickly prancing around the corner. The moose is only about 200 feet away.

At first I thought it was awesome that we were finally seeing the moose, but then it stared us down. I've never seen a moose stare me down before - usually they barely notice humans or don't seem to care.

I told my friend to just stand still.

The moose started charging at us.

Then it stopped.

Then we quickly turned around and started hoofing it the other way.

We looked back and the moose was charging us again.

Then it stopped.

Then it charged us again.

By this time it was like 100 feet away.

I'd never seen a moose agitated like this.

Since we were in the wide-open lake, and had no choice of outrunning a moose, we decided to climb into the trees on the edge of the lake to get some elevation.

The moose created a perimeter around us and started "prancing" like a horse. I've never, ever, seen a moose do this or move as fast as this one was.

It was at this point we got this one photo:

you can see how fast the moose was running by how are its tracks are apart

^^ The way the moose is facing up there, that was the way back! The moose had crossed over to the other side and was preventing us from going back where we came.

Then, all of a sudden the moose was gone.

We kept going into the trees and thought we could go around it. Then, we look up and the moose was in the trees! Just staring us down! Just 60 feet away.

It was like a stare down / face off. We had nowhere to go.

We felt stuck, powerless, it was so fucking frightening.

I called my dad and the national park helpline in that moment because I had no idea what the protocol was for something like this. They told me to just chill and stand still, don't move.

We stayed for about 20 minutes.

Then, in a bold move, we decided to trek back onto the lakeside and just made a run for it (with snowshoes on).

We ran at least two miles in snowshoes as fast as we could, looking back every 5 seconds to see if it was behind us.

Eventually, we got out.

One of the scariest things of my life.

Apparently, more people are attacked by moose than any other form of wildlife, and moose attacks are increasing.

February 26th, 2020
Trying to squeeze in emails today and stay afloat, but got a friend visiting still.

It's always interesting to take full days off and *see* all of the areas of your business that somehow seem to run fine without you, and then some of the things that don't.

Obviously the goal is to get to a point where you are totally removed from the business, but it's actually helpful to take these days off to really see those.

Hoping to sort of get there by the end of the year. Also, this year, one of my goals is to do a "think week". I just need to get a few more things sorted before that, like customer support person for Pigeon...

My journal entries will be back (in full form) in a couple days, cheers.

February 25th, 2020
placeholder - check back soon...

- the real lessons behind it
- hubris on twitter (people really hate that)
- being the darling company makes everyone hate you
- give credit where its due
- angry mobs
- hit pieces
- jealousy
- being humble

February 25th, 2020
Got a friend visiting and I had to take most of the day off yesterday.

We went to these natural hot springs by the Snake River here in Jackson, Wyoming.

They look like this:

Natural hot springs

We were there for over 3 hours.

We saw a bald eagle about 100 feet away it was insane.

I need to take more days off and unplug. After I got back I had a million emails but they all could wait.

Taking the next couple days mostly off!