December 12th, 2019
The last few weeks have been tough, I'm finding that I'm becoming more "worried" about my businesses every day.

I'm nervous every morning I wake up and check my email. Will there be a new churn? A really bad bug? Will my employees quit?

To a degree, I think this is normal. When you run a business you always have that lingering feeling that it could all fall apart.

But it wasn't always this bad for me. It has definitely gotten worse.

Something needs to change.

I associate my own ego with my business. To me, my business is a part of me. So when something bad happens in the business, it affects my mood, my self-worth, etc.

When I was running Starter Story, I felt less like that. I think part of it was because I had a full-time job, so money wasn't an issue. The project could fail and I'd be fine. And also, I cared less about the idea and the market. I felt that I was more indifferent to the content and the idea, because I was interviewing other people. It was less of a representation of me.

But that is different with Pigeon. Each churn feels like a big blow, and I often take it personally.

Over the last couple days though, I feel I've been climbing out of this mentality. I need to accept the fact that all of my customers could churn tomorrow, go to $0 monthly revenue, and I would still be OK. And I still wouldn't quit with the idea, just adjust and keep focusing on the future.

I still have a successful project that is making money and enough runway for a couple years. 

I will always figure it out.